Perceptia Press: Old Grammarians

by Scott Gardner

So you're a language teacher? Or you're interested in language teaching. Welcome to the world of Old Grammarians. Isn't it about time that you figured out how to crawl with style out of your classroom into a world filled with light, joy, and comic relief. You have been seeking for something to give you that incredible endless energy, and something that you can take back into every class with you to inspire you to ever greater heights of teaching creativity. Seek no further, for you have found the haven of the Old Grammarian. Each word is laden with promise, inspiration, and jokes that will make you chortle and guffaw. Old Grammarians is carefully researched and written to take you to new bizarre vistas for exploring your classroom and your world. Buy this book. Teaching will never be the same.

Authentic and Less Authentic Reviews of Old Grammarians

Top 10 Reasons for Buying this Book

“A nauseating rat’s nest of a read. But it seems lots of people out there like that sort of thing.”

—I. Q. Smug, The Village Eviscerator

“I have yet to read a book anything like this one. In fact, I’ve yet to read this one.”

—Claude Pittance, The San Antonio Snout

“I liked it.”

—yrajrk99, www.cr*pb**kf*r*ms.org/rant/663871.html

“My favorite part was when the lady opened the door and found Mr. Jenkins pushing the goat out the window...oh sorry, I guess that sort of spoils the ending.”

—L. Tribulate, The Boston Ruiner

“I recommend this book to anyone who’s going to be trapped for hours in a plane waiting for takeoff in bad weather. Of course people don’t usually plan on being in situations like that.”

—M. Kapiolani, The New York Tomes

“A book certain to brighten your day and make you smile, to make you look at those pretty bougainvilleas in your neighbor’s garden across the street and say, ‘Isn’t it great to be alive?’”

—Kurt Loaded, Guitar Metal Sludge Casket Magazine

10. Funnier than David Letterman's teeth.

9. Contains detailed, illustrated instructions on how to combat the H1N1 influenza virus (see p. 11).

8. Most of your annoying colleagues haven't bought it, and you don't want to be like them, do you?

7. The Democratic Party of Japan have neither endorsed nor cancelled its publication.

6. Biodegrades harmlessly into chortle, chuckle, and guffaw molecules.

5. The author confesses to several illicit sexual liaisons (see p. 122).

4. Free CD-ROM (not included).

3. Several unnamed but very prestigious universities are using it as their main English text for 2010.

2. Features easy-to-smell type.

1. Can be used as a flotation device.

Also see: Ten Reasons NOT to Buy Old Grammarians

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